Parental Perplexities ~ Part 2 ~ An acquired collection of human/parental characteristics.

July 31, 2012 at 12:38 am (WSGD Newes)


In part 1, I shared a struggle with understanding what many authors refer to in the characteristics of parent/child relations. I will share an example to help illustrate.

Taken from The Christian In Complete Armor by William Gurnall.
There is a five-fold tie or engagement that ties upon God’s power to be the saint’s life-guard.
First Tie. The near relation He hath to His saints. They are His own dear children; every one takes care of his own – the silly hen, how doth she bustle and bestir herself to gather her brood under her wing when the kite appears? No care like that which nature teacheth. How much more will God, who is the Father of such dispositions in His creature, stir up His whole strength to defend His children? ‘He said, They are My people, so He became their Saviour,’ (Is. Xxxiii 8) As if God had said, Shall I sit still with My hand in My bosom, while My own people are thus misused before My face? I cannot bear it,  The mother as she sits in her house hears one shriek, and knowing the voice, cries out, ‘O it is my child.’ Away she throws all, and runs to him.  Thus God takes the alarm of His children’s cry: ‘I heard Ephraim bemoaning himself, saith the Lord;’ his cry pierced His ear, and His ear affected His bowels, and His bowels called up His power to the rescue of him.

The language used here for the hen, did not come hard to my senses. I understood and have witnessed animals with their young. They indeed have a unique nature. Though there are animals who eat their young…this is not common in the animal kingdom though. So I immediately had frame of reference to this protective nature as displayed with the hen in the above passage. It was where the human parentage came in that I hesitated.
I must qualify…when the above was written it was in the 1600’s. Not having been of that era, I can’t speak with any authority to how mothers were with their children then. I can speak to the vast difference in society and culture between then as now, it makes a huge difference in father/mother/child relations. But that will be expounded on in another part later. For now I give the above example to clarify my meaning in part 1.

As part of “studying to show myself approved” I began to share with God my hesitation with connecting His vast protective nature with that of the father/mother/child examples I read of so often in both devotional and Biblical references. He led me to list the characteristics I had stored in my “hard-drive” based on experience and observation up to this point, that which defined a father and mother. Here is the list:

(The list are headed under father then mother. Though some traits can be interchangable, some can not. Its not meant to be “sexist” or biased in gender)

Fathers: distant, uninvolved relationally, full of complaint and review, avoidance of intimacy, self-interest motivated, self-protection inspired, sarcastic and cynical, negative, fully committed to temporary pay-off’s (ie: work = paycheck, church = example of trust/respect, performance = acceptance, sex = manhood (illusions of love) ), minimal efforts in really knowing a person, not given to teaching and patient instruction, either abandons children outright, or abandons them in every way except to provide and some don’t even do that but stay…why? Noone can say least of all themselves. Either at work or play or in front of the TV, computer, or other gadgets of entertaining value. Quick to remind the child their worth by how long they left their lights on, how much their instrument’s, toys, clothes, even food cost them. Content to let “the mom” do everything especially the relational stuff.
On a positive note, most fathers at least work for their families, though most don’t feel its only their job to do so. As a result fatherhood is seen as a duty not a delight.

Mothers: busy, distracted, tired, stressed, over-worked, spacey, to self-projected in their parenting, argumentative, fearful, overly protective or the opposite, seemingly out for popularity rather than integrity, in some twisted way self-absorbed without coming across that way?, inconvenienced, announcing how proud they are to be a mom all the while sarcastic about what a pain kids can be, to interested in how their kids make them look, always trying to bounce more “balls” than nessessary or sit on 10 chairs with one butt…how can this example be encouraging? To interested in appearances, a great example of being “able to do anything” in quantity but not able to settle for doing a few things well. Gossipy, slanderish and judgmental. If religious, they have no time for deep relationship with God, hence can not teach or model it, will go with the flow with what’s popular to keep their children from rejection, shouts and yelling (blaming and accusation) or a silent “victim mentality” (feel sorry for me/guilt trip).

As I stated earlier there are exceptions, and these are the negatives only (the positive will get mentioned 🙂 ). But the purpose to the list-making was to review that which makes it hard to view God as He says He is as a “parent” to His children. Also, as I mentioned in part 1, these are characteristics that are found as a result of the larger base of experience, either personally to me or in my observations and much of those friends and families sharing of their own with me. This is not meant to represent a “national” average or overall, all encompassed view. Though I will say, that one need only watch about an hour of TV -any show, read post on social networks on the computer or attend a group at a local church to get the gist that this may sadly be closer to the broad-based experience than most would like to believe.

This part of the series is the most difficult to do. I am not given to enjoying pointing out the negatives. I at least like to counter with a list of positives to try to balance things to a more comfortable degree. Yet as is so often Gods way (not like ours or mine) He often asks us to stare at what feels yucky and openly admit it so He can heal and renew our minds with His perspective and truth. This is the objective here, not to illuminate the fine points of parental calamities and profane the honor of those roles! It is indeed also written on my “hard-drive” the many blessings and good characteristics of fathers/mothers too. They will get their press time too.

For now, please prayerfully review the lists and ask yourself: Do any of these characteristics ring true to me? Then ask God: If they do, do they keep me from truly seeing and knowing You? Will You, as my heavenly Father, please show me how they do and then show me and re-write my frame of reference that I may more completely be Your child?

This is where we must begin, if we are to follow, obey, and love our Saviour, Yeshua (Jesus) our Shepherd, and Way to the Father.

Grace and peace in Yeshua the Messiah 🙂


  1. linda herz said,

    Minds under construction… i have your back samwise. you are now entering the mines of moria…..don’t look back! the balrog shall be slain. luvnhugs


Leave a Reply

Please log in using one of these methods to post your comment: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.

sevv61's Blog

A great site

In Spirit and In Truth The Word

"Ye shall know the truth and the truth shall set you free"

Yiddishkeit 101™

Jewish educational tools for all ages

Answers in Torah

Messianic Judaism (Nazarenes-Netzarim)

Jeremiah 33 Three

I will call to Him and He will answer.

Lessons From Lou

Kainos Ktisis - What it Means to Be a New Creature in Christ!

Impartial Christian Ministries

“Truly I understand that God shows no partiality." Acts 10:34

Morning Meditations

"When you awake in the morning, learn something to inspire you and mediate upon it, then plunge forward full of light with which to illuminate the darkness." -Rabbi Tzvi Freeman

Biblical Word Studies: Inspirational Commentary Translation and Exegesis

Bible Study, News and Research from a Heavenly Perspective


It is a great mystery that though the human heart longs for Truth, in which alone it finds liberation and delight, the first reaction of human beings to Truth is one of hostility and fear! -Anthony de Mello

Men of One Accord

Just another site

Wise Devotions For Inspiration

Devotions are able to guide when scripture is posted, and to show someone our lives with God in it, to help others prosper like God intended.

Mustard Seed Budget

God's blessings in your life and ministry

Mind Traffic

Thought's to Inspire


Filled with words of inspiration.

From the Inside Out

Impressions Becoming Expressions

Gentile 4 Yeshua

Just another site

%d bloggers like this: