He (Adonai) answered, “Set your mind at ease – My presence will go with you after all.” Moses replied, “If Your presence doesn’t go with us don’t make us go on from here…
That is what distinguishes us, me and Your people, from all other people’s on earth.”
Has it ever occurred to you that God so often used very odd circumstances to get in to a place deep within us, that has absolutely nothing to do with the circumstances themselves? He sets the board, and what we see moves us forward accordingly. As things progress, it becomes rather obvious that He’s moving in through back doors to the goal He had in mind. Almost as if He distracts us with our limited vision and surface prone tendencies, to sneak in where we wouldn’t have went with Him any other way. I’ve experienced this on many occasions, recently as well. The past experiences didn’t que me in to look for His back door agendas in any of these cases. When God wants to move in behind something, no human on earth can track His movements until He’s reached His destination! Only then, can we look back and trace His path, but not until He’s popped up in the seemingly most intentionally sneaky way. It’s been said repeatedly before: “if we saw where God was leading us, we’d most often recalculate our GPS in the other direction.”
At the end of October, 2015 God pointed His finger, very obviously, in the direction of a new location, new plan, and said “go buy a house, in that place.” We were set on a different location for moving, our plans moved north with our hearts, Montana was home. He pointed South. Our plans were to move into an RV and with our new business travel, live simple, and find a home base in Montana at some point. Sick of moving, sick of all the stuff that one accumulates in a house or apartment, we wanted to be free of it, and mobile to go where God said go. All very good intentions, none violating any will of God, but still not His will for us, however our perspectives saw it.
So the house hunt ensued, we found one, and all hell broke loose in the process. Two months of grinding, stressful and rest stealing work began. Staying close to Him, we followed every step, endured crazy situations, and wound up with it all falling through. Not the results we humans expect when we feel we’ve done all God asked of us. Yet even at this place, we trusted and went forth on another house hunt (it continues). All the while, God was with us and went before us, we knew that. What wasn’t obvious was that He was slipping in behind us, moving into the center of us, arriving at His intended destination, our hearts, His Home, not a relocation or house on earth. God knows us so well, we don’t face things unless we’re forced to. Circumstances are the forces He uses to bring us to that inner mirror, the one that reflects us back at ourselves but not only do we see ourselves but we can’t avoid seeing ourselves as He sees us in these moments. It’s a faithfulness on His part to go so great a route to get us there. We don’t need to just see ourselves, we need to see ourselves with Him. All the grace and mercy He has to give is ready there. If we just see ourselves, raw and rotten, without Him – we will be lost and walk away without remembering what we look like. But with Him, as hard as that reflection may look with His perfection hovering about us, there’s a pivotal transformation that becomes possible. The circumstances that brought us there, fades into the background becoming relatively insignificant. The house, the place, those were and are insignificant compared to His presence and passion to develop His character in the home Yeshua and His Father took up residence in the day we turned our souls back into Their care. (John 14:23)
At this juncture, Adonai has revealed His path into the back yard of our hearts, and we are now “getting down to business”. The house hunt continues, relocation all on the horizon, but the real work is right where we are, no matter where we are geographically. Big things that have been hidden and slipped through the cracks are being reflected in His eyes, ever so compassionately and full of that grace that pours out like roaring rivers, Sam and I stand at this place of healing intent. I reach my arms out wide to receive whatever shall keep me here until He has done all He shall do. I pray my beloved will do the same. I have confidence in the work of my God and His ways. More to be revealed. ..but today its enough to know He’s with us. That this alone is what distinguishes us as His – His presence – nothing more, nothing less. We hover at the mirror, eyes on Him and tracking His finger where He is pointing within, waiting on the grace, holding onto the new mercies He’s promised this morning will provide, yielding to His hands as they reshape the clay that these circumstances have softened enough to submit to Him. And once again, we wait. ..He works, we wait. He shapes, we yield. He holds us, we lean into being held.
A quote from Wayne Stiles book Waiting on God.
This section comes from the chapter titled Letting Go.
To resist or resent the time God’s priorities require amounts to resisting God.
Waiting on God reminds us of those facts. Waiting keeps us humble. Waiting shows us over the passing of time that it’s all about God and none of it is about us – except to the degree that we glorify Him. Remember, the goal is God’s glory, not our productivity or personal fulfillment. In our waiting, God weans us from the pride of having to control everything or understand matters “too difficult for” us (Ps. 131:1). God chooses how we glorify Him. He alone selects which of His servants will produce what levels of output – and yet, He also rewards faithfulness on any level with equal commendation (see Matt. 25:14-23).
God works through our waiting to strengthen our character through weakness, to develop our peace of mind by trusting Him in chaos, to teach us that we can glorify Him just as much by waiting on Him as we can by serving Him. When we choose to find our fulfillment in His glory, then we can wait on Him to open the door of greater influence in His time. That’s really His business entirely. Ours is to live faithfully wherever He puts us now.
God’s timing knows it’s own reasons. Perhaps the delay occurs to test how seriously we will pray. Our maybe, in spite of all we’ve learned, God still has more to teach us. Our maybe the delay has little to do with us at all – because it depends on someone else responding to God.
Whatever the reasons, I’m convinced that in most cases God delays because He wants to give us more than we’re asking for. He loves us enough to wait to give us His best rather than to satisfy our impatience with a quick, cheap substitute. That’s why we mustn’t equate His delay with a deaf ear. Sometimes what seems like God’s apathy is really His mercy.
Slammed doors do more than bend your nose; they keep your heart pliable, sensitive, and available to God’s leading. Not only does He keep secret the difficult valleys you’ll experience (and many of the mountaintops) but also the tremendous lessons you’ll glean no other way. Lessons you didn’t know you needed to learn. Lessons you’ll thank Him for one day. You may fail to recognize God using you significantly because you define God “using you” in terms of what you consider significant: results. God defines results in terms of character. Words like productivity and efficiency remain conspicuously absent from the fruit of the Spirit (see Gal. 5:22-23). These results of God working in your life all reflect character – His character. Character alone produces godly results.
– end quote, (they came from various sections; in order but with some left out for length shortening purposes)
♡ Grace and peace in Yeshua the Messiah ♡
The above verse is one I started to put to memory around 6 months ago. I taped it written out to my bathroom wall, front door, cupboard in my kitchen, and started tattooing it on my heart. At the time, we had just launched our own business. I was sure I’d need to be reminded I was seen and known by God, (both Sam and I) and even more sure that it would stretch us with testing. Little did I know the extent of such testing! One month after our launch into S Corp-ship, God pointed His finger at a different geographical location for us. We blinked and blinked, shook our heads to attempt to clear our eyes in case we were “seeing things” and said “okay, Lord, we’ll knock on the doors – Your will be done.”
What else could we do? Doors flew open, and we got the message.
So in the midst of an already crazy schedule with huge adjustments being made already, off I went to find a house in Rio Rancho, NM. It took 4 days longer than planned (nothing really in perspective) but here sat a house that seemed to have been literally set aside specifically for us. No interest in the property for months and open houses unattended…ours was the only offer. This house was so nice it was rather odd it hasn’t just screamed off the market, lesser houses had but this one just sat there. The owner and I both remarked that it seemed Someone had this place in mind for us. The contract was signed, inspections passed with flying colors and off I went back to Denver to pack. Meanwhile, all the stuff of life still needed tending to and the holidays were about to converge on the calender.
Busy became a newly defined word for us. Stretched? Huh, we were as maxed out as a human could get on every level. The verse on the various surfaces and constantly rolling over my mind was being tattooed every second of the day. I leaned on it, and joy bubbled within. Oh how we had been praying for God to move us out of Denver! An answer came, though the direction was not what we expected, nor hoped. It was around the beginning of December that Wayne Stiles book Waiting on God fell into my hands and I began to traverse it’s pages with much desperation. The legistics to buying the house were solid, but it seemed that we picked the one house that could not be sold as it was due to a new city zoning ordinance that was enacted right about the time I first laid eyes on it. It had to have a garage. The owner was in a real bad spot now having to deal with a huge hit to the pocket book. The search to find a way out of it began as my boxes filled up and our nerves began to be tested in extreme.
Then began the whole “everything that can go wrong will go wrong” motto to EVEYTYHING we did. Our truck got vandalized, computers for the business crashed, parts went out, answers about the house vasselated going back and forth with no real answers, Sam’s grandpa died. Continuing to “head south for the winter” became impossible. Limbo is and has been the motif since mid November. Living out of and surrounded by boxes has lost its excitement. Do we doubt what God said in the beginning or wonder whether we heard Him? Yet He wouldn’t release us to pull out of the deal. No clear shut doors would occur no matter how hard we pressed for one. Limbo drags on, and our back is sore. “What in heavens name?”
The house has lost all and I mean all its appeal. We just want to empty boxes and return to a state of “normal”. Here – there, we don’t care. God’s will be done has been our prayer, fingers off the whole thing!
We wait and ask only that our eyes stay tightly tuned into the process, the lesson being taught, the wisdom to be gained and light to be shared. The light grows dimmer in our vision, limbo is starting to feel like torture. Still no release.
Then I come across this treasure of words from Abba, Waynes book.
They shackled his (Joseph) feet with chains, and they bound him in irons; until the time when his Word proved true, God’s utterance kept testing him.
Is it ironic that that verse in Jeremiah became a project for memory back in June? I don’t think so. I’m not big on coincidences, cause I don’t believe God considers anything such.
Here’s a quote from Waynes book.
The whole book centers on Joseph’s story. Wow, what I’m learning! Its clear the testing we’ve encountered is no accident, and just like Joseph, we do not see what all God is doing, most of what He’s doing, in fact! Somewhere behind hidden doors, God’s moving fast and furious, solidifying His will, not just for us, but every single person that has been and will be effected by all this. We’re not the only ones waiting. ..everyone connected to this is waiting, family, friends, realtors, lenders, neighbors, everyone! Waiting and watching very closely because God said to us to go and now He’s held us for a time at the crossing. People are weary of the prospect of saying “goodbye” to us where we are, others can’t wait for us to arrive. What a strange turn of events and the circumstances just lay in front of us, waiting for God’s green light. Whichever way He gives it, all will welcome the release. Stay or go, it doesn’t matter.
Have my eyes stayed on You, my God and King? Is my devotion to You the brightest light? Oh, how my heart truly hopes so, dear Lord! May Your honor continue to stretch out my weary and waiting soul. Not for a house or for empty boxes, but Your Salvation displayed for all to see. Your beautiful timing and amazing will! Your strong protection and constant presence, no matter the situation! What a promise! Just like You were with Joseph, You are with us, through all. There is no greater gift! Test me, Adonai, and make true my devotion to You!
♡ Grace and peace in Yeshua the Messiah ♡
There very idea that God is waiting to show grace to me, compassion, mercy (chesed) springs forth such awe into my soul. I almost always see myself as the waiting one. Learning patience, practicing my trust muscle to wait for Adonai (the Lord) to show up in some answer or circumstance. Today, I will linger longer on the fact that He is waiting for me. There is somewhere within that He longs to pour out His grace, compassion and mercy on me. Oh that He would turn my eyes to see this place daily that I may receive Him in the fullness of His measure. There I place myself along the side of the road to wait on where God is waiting in me.
To stop and ponder His timing – so perfect, so intimate, so tender. To look for Him instead of where I can meet Him. He’s there, waiting for me. Ready to pull the picture into true focus. Counting down the sands in the hour-glass of each exact moment He can pour out into my soul all that He is. Timing…a great illusion to my finite eyes.
And what can be more of the greatness of His treasure held out to me than His Grace? Whose compassion can be more acutely and profoundly healing than His? Is there a more fulfilling place to be than inside His mercy?
I am waiting…waiting on You, my Master, Redeemer! Come, wait no more to pour out Your grace to me. My arms are open, waiting on You, to wait no more, for me today!
♡ Grace and Shalom in Yeshua the Messiah ♡
Liquid pleasure through my toes
A thread of hair the gentle breeze blows
The softest measure of Your sweet touch
I’m on the hunt for just this much
We take advantage, O God on High
Of the simple pleasure of Your passing by
Canvas making a world unseen
Holding sunlight on witness beams
The stoke of Genius
While freedom gives
You art my Maker
Body and soul
Only Your touch
Can make me whole
Come Thou Lover
With Life’s caress
Enlighten my nerves
With nothing less
Than the trust required
To feel Your love
And never take advantage
Of Your precious nudge
Beyond the borders
Of this my frame
Color me in
With Your great Name
♡ Grace and Shalom in Yeshua the Messiah ♡
A snapshot in two times, two prophets, two children of the Father, one a prophet drawn by the heart of the Father with bitter warnings, one The Prophet, the Son of God, the One the former prophet warned and spoke of, given by the heart of the Father as the ultimate gift for the world.
Both of these scriptures come within the context of woes and warnings. Both reveal the heart of the Father, that weeps for our unwillingness to listen, to obey, to see His mighty merciful and longing Fatherly heart. Firm but broken open for the refusal of His people.
Too, often God is pictured as the rule giving, too demanding, too strict, lacking in understanding and patience. It was 470 year from Jeremiah to Yeshua (Jesus), it’s been roughly 2011 years since Yeshua to now. Could any of us be patient like God the Father? How many of us would wait, longing, hoping, working, loving. ..for just that amount of time 2481 years, how about a tenth of that? Now consider since the creation of the world? I think He still weeps, reaching with longing arms towards us. I relate, as a parent, as He intended for that experience to show us His own heart. Reaching for my children, lost and wandering, searching for answers different than the ones they’ve been taught. Knowing deep down God’s way is best, but mixing up their own with His attempting to do it their own way. I remember well my own searching, wandering, wayward bend. This reminder is recalled daily as I learn anew how deep that cavern goes in my flesh. As a young woman, I felt nothing but my own displeasure and disgust for my behavior. This I projected onto God the Father. I thank God everyday, that now I know He weeps for me, reaches out for me, full of love, with the strength of His compassion! Most people don’t see how full of power The Father’s compassion is! The unbending hold of His tears! Holding all things in a seeming state of suspense to us, but winding down into His awesome will like seeds of flowers in a field about to be doust with spring rain to prove what we can’t see is just there, resting in His hand that feeds all things in His timing! Alone the seeds seem small and worthless. The ground, fallow from winter sleeps, seem dark and lifeless.
God the Father seems to be content with lack of growth for a time. Perhaps He is. Content because He has never made even one little thing that can not and will not grow. The rains are His tears, all around the world, the flood of His tears run and slide and wash away the things of this world that could never provide what His tears could and can. Elsewhere, the drought of His weeping until there are no more tears, turns the earth into a cleansing fire. Man sees it as a destructive invasion, God sends His tears in the form of a scould to stop the bleeding of wounds. Haven’t you ever cried so hard so long that tears ran dry?
Thousands of years ago, there was a weeping prophet, drawn into and compelled by the very heart of a weeping God. Then came a weeping Savior, whose final tear as a human torn asunder, fell from His cheek with the words “It is finished“. The weeping will now one day be turned into nothing but dancing! The arms of the Loving Father are now held out, wide open, desiring that none should perish, so the weeping continues, and the longing, reaching, teaching, faithful patience that makes Him who He is!
These are two reflections, of the heart of Abba Father.Remember He weeps with us, groans with us or rather our own weeping and groaning reflect Him! His patience has purpose for all of us. Those of us who acknowledge Him in all our ways, those who run from Him, and those who will be lost to Him forever. How long will I hold out for my child? As long as I have breath in my body. God’s breath created the very beginning of all things, it shall never run out, it shall never grow old and decay, it is eternal. We remember, we are not waiting on word for this or that; we wait on Him. We are not waiting for answers to prayer; we are waiting on Him! The answers are already there! We aren’t waiting on jobs, raises, houses, results, beginnings or endings; we wait on Him. We wait on Him, and He is worth waiting for! May we find that we are satisfied, as the earth we stand, sit, and rest upon is satisfied with all He provides!
♡ Grace and Shalom in Yeshua the Messiah ♡